ears

ok i have heard of tears in your beer,,but come on  tears in your ears     crap  its gotta get better     i cant seem to bounce back  its taking me longer this time  i cant seem to get motivated to do the things i do each day    i felt my ear and it...

title

cant eat  and i cant sleep  oh boy i have gotten in too deep   gotta get out of this place in my head   it dont help just to lie there on my bed,its hard to pretend  but i will do it till the end  couse thats how its gonna be for me  crapp i just want...

savings

ok yesterday i went to the bank to cashout all my change  heck i had 50 bucks in change  well anyway  it was so my boy could go to the movies with his friend,the teller asked if i wanted to start a savings plan for my boys,,ok  so i did,,well i told...

hole

ok i need to find my shovel  not just any shovel  my very best one,,need to dig a huge hole   may take me awhile  im not very big,but i am strong  ya mom strong!!!better do it at nite so no one will see what i am up to,make sure the yapper doggy...

good day

hello one and all  hope everyone is good today,the boys and i are gonna be happy   no gloom and doom,,he wanted to discuss finances    shit i just got up,,,have some coffee  laugh with the boys   make breakfast  have a peaceful morning and day,made...

talk

boy my bro called me rite when i needed him,i ranted and raved about old rockheart,he let me go on and on for awhile,he gave me some good advice and told me i was a special person with a tender soul and heart  hay im no sissy girl or anything,,i put...

hmm

arnt we all made of the same stuff? we all have red blood flowing through our vains,we all came into this world the same way,and will probably leave the same way,we all just want to live a happy life and have friends we can talk our problems to   to...

safe

its dark outside and it just feels safe to me,,its cooler thank goodness  i am sick of boiling!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i have never realy liked the daytime too bright  people judging  people looking trying to figure you out,i dont let them in my soul,that is...

thats all?

he tells me the budget,ok i got it  i can do it,he calls me and talks about money,  he visits the boys  he talks about money,he shoves a paper at me with written instructions on how i should spend my budget money,,wait a miniute is that all you ever...

ok

he called from Mexico and asked if everything was ok,,well of course its ok,,just hot  you get used to it after awhile,well anyway rockheart is on a job  some gold mine or something  hes an engineer structrual and civil,i  thank  my maker for his...

dread

ok am i wrong    i just want her to pass already,the waiting is unbearable,,shes so out of it,the family  rockhearts family are doing the best they can do under the cercumstanses,we went yesterday to see her i kissed her forhead and told her Godsspeed...

laying there

yep went to see my mom in law,just laying there asleep, well drugged on morphine  shes feeling no pain  i will just say that,she is peaceful as heck,i kissed her forhead and said i love you,she opened her eyes for a moment but it was a special...

wiggle

yep i realy dont want to go see her on her deathbed,,im no good in those situations,,yes i have to be respectful she is my mom in law,i want to remember her in a different way,like all the times we had a coffee together and just talked  or not,,she...

comminicate

yesterday i was in my kitchen and i was hearing edie  she was whispering i love you in my ear, i was hopeing it wasnt true this voice which meant only one thing,,she was gonna leave this earth,and very soon,,idid hear her as plane as day,i never tell...

home

ok she isnt doing so good,her vitals are going down hill,its her time to go back home again,,she has suffered long enough,she is 89,my mother in law,rest well,,,,,,,she will probably go today,,rockheart went to be with his mom,,,,,bjm

fast

boy this week went by so fast,i guess when you get older the time goes quickly,,the weekend is upon us,,rockheart wants to take us on vacation,hu you mean all of us together?he is not even liveing in the home,,he wants us all to have fun, ya whay dont...

peace

just messing around i guess no one needs me for anything at the moment,,i have started a new book,crime and punishment,,its good so far,,,,bjm

funds

well the boys want to go do something and  no funds in my budget for even bowling,,i feel bad,i could put it on the visa,,but rockheart has me by the nutts on that subject,oh excuse my language there,he tries to controle me  with the money issue  he...

roll your own

ok i have a friend  he rolls his own ciggs couse its cheaper   smokes are almost 6 buck a pop,he just gets papes and tabacco,,its been saveing him lots of  greenbacks   well anyway just was thinking what else he rolls up in those papes of his,,,hes a...

monkey bread

yum  the boys cant believe i have the oven on,,its already hot so why not have some goodies to make your mouth happy  well your tastebuds,,,,monkey bread  has brown sugar and butter and heavy cream,,oh boy a heart attack on a plate,,,did i say the...

nebraska heat

went to the canal boy it was about 100 degrees no shade buggs  well you get the picture,caught these catfish,they are fighters and fun to catch,i was fishing with some natives to the area,fun times   well anyway i caught the biggest and the most of...

power

ok rockheart has been living outside the home for awhile,,its no different realy having him gone as when he is here,no emotional support  thats cool i got used to it,not gonna curl up and die,i have other avenues  like great brothers who adore the...

clubing

ok my youngest has a friend    he hangs out with him in his mansion, yes this place  i think Trump lives there    im not kidding  10 bedrooms,we dont have a mansion just a modest ranch home,,,boy  airconditioning  in every tiolet  go figure,,,they...

ok

i will try this once again,,,bjm

big one

yes i am gonna catch the big one,it got bigger since last season  and fatter  all the better for my tummy,fresh trout   oh boy i am salavating already,,,the big guy is haunting me when i am awake and when i am in slumber,teasing me to come up the...